Ho Ho Ho readers....it's time for the Philly Sports Phans to hand out his Christmas Gifts for the year. After the debacles we’ve suffered through this past year, it would be really easy to give a giant lump of coal to many of the teams in town, but I've decided to be a bit more creative in my gift giving this year. So, without further adieu....
To the Phillies: I give them a disfiguring motor cycle accident to Pat Burrell similar to the one that befell Big Ben Roethlisberger. Ok...Ok...I know you're asking yourself..."how the hell would that be a present??" Well, I'm figuring if Pat the Bat messes up his pretty face, he'll spend less time chasing broads at the Center City night spots and spend more time in the batting cage getting his swing back in order. (Or maybe we’d get the same result if the guy just settled down and got married, but I like my scenario better.) If Burrell can regain his former status as a dependable home run bat in the lineup, the Phils will have found the right handed hitter to protect Ryan Howard that they spent all offseason searching for.
Phillies Stocking Stuffer: A reliever or two to unexpectedly shake out of a tree and stabilize a bullpen that looks pretty sparse at the moment.
To The Eagles: A favorable playoff draw. I like this team against anyone in the horrid NFC except the Saints in N’Awlins and maybe a first round game against the G Men. Unfortunately, this is how it looks like it is going to play out, so I’m a bit nervous as the playoffs approach.
Eagles Stocking Stuffer: Some playing time for Brodrick Bunkley. It is ridiculous that JJ is not giving this kid PT. The only way he is going to develop is to get on the field. I think it is preposterous that this kid can't give you more than what Darwin Walker, Mike Patterson and Sam Rayburn do on a down to down basis.
To The Sixers: An injury to Andre Miller. I'm pretty afraid that this guy may make this team respectable enough to keep out us out of the first five picks of next year's draft. I'm looking for an injury that’s not so serious to hinder his long term health, but something that will keep him out of the lineup for most of the rest of the year.
Sixers Stocking Stuffer: The continued develop of Iggy on the offensive end. Since AI was jettisoned from the team, the new AI seems much more aggressive on the offensive end. Let's hope that continues.
To The Flyers: I don't think I have enough space to list all the gifts this franchise needs. I'll just settle on giving on them some team dumb enough to trade the Orange & Black some decent prospects and picks for Peter Forsberg. Foppa is done and wants to call it quits. It sure looks like he’s tired of the losing, the skate problems and the injuries. I just hope the Flyers can pry some future assets out of a team that wants to rent him for the rest of the year.
Flyers Stocking Stuffer: A veto button for Ed Snider. Ed Snider needs to veto any trade Holmgren wants to make coming down the stretch of this season that eats up any more cap space. Going into next year, the Flyers should have a ton of dough to spend on free agents to remake this team so it better fits in the "new NHL", which is brutal by the way.
To The City of Philadelphia: Hope for a Championship. After 23 years without a title, I do not have to explain to a single reader why this is so important to us as phans. We all see the flaws with the Birds and realize they likely would have little chance against the AFC rep should they some how get through the NFC, but at least this team gives the city hope. After yesterday, Jeff Garcia has become a folk legend in this town and all of Philly is ready to rally around him as the Birds steam towards the playoffs.
As for our other teams, the Phils appear to have squandered another offseason where they could have grabbed this city by the throat and taken control, but it looks like they didn’t do enough to improve the lineup or the bullpen, which will doom them to once again finishing a few games short of the postseason. The Winter teams are both years away from contention, but decent lottery picks and free agent pickups this offseason could sure speed up the process and get us excited for 07-08.
Ok….now on to my Eagles review from last night’s brilliant performance.
To the Phillies: I give them a disfiguring motor cycle accident to Pat Burrell similar to the one that befell Big Ben Roethlisberger. Ok...Ok...I know you're asking yourself..."how the hell would that be a present??" Well, I'm figuring if Pat the Bat messes up his pretty face, he'll spend less time chasing broads at the Center City night spots and spend more time in the batting cage getting his swing back in order. (Or maybe we’d get the same result if the guy just settled down and got married, but I like my scenario better.) If Burrell can regain his former status as a dependable home run bat in the lineup, the Phils will have found the right handed hitter to protect Ryan Howard that they spent all offseason searching for.
Phillies Stocking Stuffer: A reliever or two to unexpectedly shake out of a tree and stabilize a bullpen that looks pretty sparse at the moment.
To The Eagles: A favorable playoff draw. I like this team against anyone in the horrid NFC except the Saints in N’Awlins and maybe a first round game against the G Men. Unfortunately, this is how it looks like it is going to play out, so I’m a bit nervous as the playoffs approach.
Eagles Stocking Stuffer: Some playing time for Brodrick Bunkley. It is ridiculous that JJ is not giving this kid PT. The only way he is going to develop is to get on the field. I think it is preposterous that this kid can't give you more than what Darwin Walker, Mike Patterson and Sam Rayburn do on a down to down basis.
To The Sixers: An injury to Andre Miller. I'm pretty afraid that this guy may make this team respectable enough to keep out us out of the first five picks of next year's draft. I'm looking for an injury that’s not so serious to hinder his long term health, but something that will keep him out of the lineup for most of the rest of the year.
Sixers Stocking Stuffer: The continued develop of Iggy on the offensive end. Since AI was jettisoned from the team, the new AI seems much more aggressive on the offensive end. Let's hope that continues.
To The Flyers: I don't think I have enough space to list all the gifts this franchise needs. I'll just settle on giving on them some team dumb enough to trade the Orange & Black some decent prospects and picks for Peter Forsberg. Foppa is done and wants to call it quits. It sure looks like he’s tired of the losing, the skate problems and the injuries. I just hope the Flyers can pry some future assets out of a team that wants to rent him for the rest of the year.
Flyers Stocking Stuffer: A veto button for Ed Snider. Ed Snider needs to veto any trade Holmgren wants to make coming down the stretch of this season that eats up any more cap space. Going into next year, the Flyers should have a ton of dough to spend on free agents to remake this team so it better fits in the "new NHL", which is brutal by the way.
To The City of Philadelphia: Hope for a Championship. After 23 years without a title, I do not have to explain to a single reader why this is so important to us as phans. We all see the flaws with the Birds and realize they likely would have little chance against the AFC rep should they some how get through the NFC, but at least this team gives the city hope. After yesterday, Jeff Garcia has become a folk legend in this town and all of Philly is ready to rally around him as the Birds steam towards the playoffs.
As for our other teams, the Phils appear to have squandered another offseason where they could have grabbed this city by the throat and taken control, but it looks like they didn’t do enough to improve the lineup or the bullpen, which will doom them to once again finishing a few games short of the postseason. The Winter teams are both years away from contention, but decent lottery picks and free agent pickups this offseason could sure speed up the process and get us excited for 07-08.
Ok….now on to my Eagles review from last night’s brilliant performance.
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