Tip Of The Week

Tip #1: If you really want to have a good laugh, I implore you all to check out Uncle Cholly's interview with Wheels during each 1210 AM pregame radio show. It is absolutely exquisite. It usually takes him until about the 3/4 mark of the interview before he puts together a coherent sentence. I'm pretty sure I've passed on this advice before, but if you still haven't checked it out, you're doing yourself a disservice.

Tip #2: Make sure to watch a Jamie Moyer at bat. It will make you feel much better about your own athleticism watching him flail at balls like a drunken farmer swinging at shit in the dirt. Something tells me he preferred the American League where he never had to bad.

By the way, the Phils look lifeless tonight. Moyer just gave up a bomb to the 2nd most hated teammate in the NL, Jeff Kent. I'm going to bed. I doubt the Phils will make up a 5 run deficit against Brad Penny.

10,000

For all those who were stuck under a rock this evening and somehow missed it, the Phils were pounded this evening 10-2 by the Cards. However, more importantly, tonight's loss marked the franchise's all time 10,000th loss. I do have to give this group of Phils some credit for fighting off this monumental loss for 4 games. They could have rolled over like dogs. That would have been the true Phillie way. Additionally, I was actually happy the milestone loss occurred on ESPN. Joe Morgan, John Miller, and John Kruk all commented on the topic and gave the national audience some decent perspective on this accomplishment and the Phillie phan base. Had this broadcast been on Comcast, I think Phils' produced telecast would have mostly blown off the topic.

Plus, I loved how the phans reacted by cheering the team at the end of the game. We showed the entire country how great a phan base we are. The phans were basically announcing to the entire country, "yes, our freakin' team has 10,000 all time losses, yet we're still here selling out the stadium and supporting our team!" They weren't cheering the Phils for losing. We were cheering ourselves for sticking with this team through thick and thin.

Anyhow, everyone else is putting their 2 cents on the Phils' 10,000th loss, so there is no better time than the present to weigh in as well. Surprisingly, think it is not that a big a deal. It is more a reflection of how bad this franchise was for so long from its inception through the 70's. While, I can give this franchise a pass for the 10,ooo, it does not mean I'm not incredibly frustrated by this team. I know I've discussed it ad nauseum, but I completely detest this ownership group and how they run this franchise.

I think just every Phils' phan is annoyed by their unwillingness to do anything that would move the team over the top. It pisses me off how they are afraid to bring anyone into the organization that won't play Mr Nice Guy and tell them what they want to hear. They don't bring in managers or GM who will tell them the truth. They just don't want to hear anything that would rock their safe little world where everything is just fine in their eyes. (By the way, this is exactly why we've had to put up with Uncle Cholly, as Monty and boys were afraid to hire Jim Leyland after he told them that Pat Burrell sucked, Lieby was toast, and two new starters were needed.)

Our owners are completely satisfied being average as long as that means the fans pack the park. As Al Morganti said this week, the Phils are owners are not greedy enough. I agree wholeheartedly with that classification. In fact, if I had to think of one word to describe the organization, it would be complacent. This current team is a perfect description of this group's ideal situation. They have enough big names (Howard, Utley, Rollins and Hamels) to bring in the phans and keep them in contention for the wild card most of the year. However, in the back of their minds, they know they will never spend additional dollars to surround these players to make the team truly a contender.

Even more annoying is that Monty and Company have never found an excuse that they couldn't wrap their hands around. Every winter it seems like we have to hear, "you know we would have made the playoffs last year if (insert name here) had not gotten hurt." Anyone else tired of that excuse?

Therefore, my frustration with the Phils is not w/ the fact that they are biggest losers in baseball history. Let's get something straight before I go any further. I have always loved the Phillies. Some of my best memories as a child is going to Sunday giveaway games with my dad and brother. I have followed this team through the mid to late 80's and mid to late 90's when they were absolutely brutal. Yet, I kept coming back for more. Christ, I even named my cat after my all time favorite Phillie, so I feel I'm fully qualified to rip the franchise.

The frustration has more to do with their "new" identity. That of a team which is "slightly above average, but woefully inconsequential. If the Phils were a basketball/NFL/hockey team, they'd be the Nuggets, Seahawks, or San Jose Sharks, a team that makes the playoffs every year as a 6, 7, or 8 seed and loses in the first round.

I just want to see the Phils change their identity. We have two successful teams in this town. The Eagles and the Flyers, but both go about it differently. The Eagles have utmost belief in their system of talent evaluation and the ability of their coaches to develop these prospects into contributing members of the team. The phans don't always agree with it, but the front office could care less as they have been proven right more times than not. They don't run out and sign
the big free agent because they believe that they have a younger, cheaper alternative that can get the job done. Banner and Lurie's system may not win Super Bowls, but it has kept them a playoff team for most of the Jeffrey Lurie era. What else can you ask for?

On the other hand, the Flyers take the damn the torpedoes approach and goes balls to the wall to make their team a winner. You need to look no further than their team make-over completed in the last couple months to see their or-GAN-IZE-a-SHUN-al philosophy in action. They do not accept losing and will make the necessary moves to improve their team. Their moves don't always work out, but you can't ask for anything more as a phan.

Now, our Phils really don't have a clear organizational approach. You can't say they rely totally on young players, or break the bank to bring in any player that can put them over the top. Mostly, the Phils' brass leaves you with a feeling that somehow they could have done more to help the team win.

Ok, if anyone is still with me, to commemorate the Loss 10K, I figured I'd have a little fun and give my all time worst Phils' lineup. Now, this lineup is not all based upon lack of talent. Some selections are actually huge disappointments due to their incoming hype. Without any further adieu, here is the lineup:

C - Lance Parrish
1B - Travis Lee
2B - Tomas Perez
SS - Juan Bell/Steve Jeltz
3B - David Bell
LF - Pat Burrell ( I would put Gregg Jeffries here, but we'd kill for a guy with Jeffries #'s at this point)
CF - Ricky Otero
RF - Danny Tartabull
Starting pitchers: Andy Ashby, Freddy Garcia, Kyle Abbott, Paul Abbott, Floyd Youmans
Relievers: Mike Jackson, Mike Williams, Arthur Rhodes, Tim Worrell, Robrto Hernandez

D Mac Loses His Beard....And Some Weight

This picture and the accompanying story are promising. He looks like he is in pretty good shape and thank god he shaved down that ridiculous beard.

Don't Get The Big Guy Angry

Remember the WWF's (I refuse to call it the WWE) in the 1980's when Hulk Hogan would get his ass beat for about a half hour, then "hulk up", give the not so fast finger, drop the big leg drop and then pin his opponent? Well, I think Bill Conlin is at that point with the Phils' ownership. He finally went apeshit and started calling out the individual owners by name. (Thank God, huh?)

Check this article out:

Bill Conlin The biggest L0,000SERSIt's time for Phillies' brass to own up to their legacy

OK, CLAIRE BETZ, why don't you and your cute, little dog sit close to the door in case of a sandbox emergency. I don't recognize any of you male partners, but if you raise your hands when your name is called, we can get started.
Let's start with you Tri-Play Associates guys. Alexander K. Buck . . . J. Mahlon Buck Jr. . . . William C. Buck. All present and accounted for.

Now, the Old Money guy . . . Since Bill Giles couldn't be with us today to represent Giles Limited Partnership, you must be John S. Middleton, of Double Play Inc.

I'm sorry if the T-shirt offends you, John. But "I'm Not the World's Biggest Loser . . . I Only Own Them" takes The Phillies Limited Partnership off the hook, if not off the griddle. In case you missed it, Claire, your investment has lost 9,999 games and shortly will become the first team in the history of any sport to lose 10,000 times. No, Claire, Dave Montgomery will not throw a party for the partners. Dave Montgomery is too busy trying to get the Phillies into the NBA, so they can make the postseason every year. That's a joke, Al, a sick one.

First, thanks for coming. You all go back to the original partnership put together by Bill Giles in 1981 in one way or another, and in 26 years, it's the first time I've ever seen you all in one place - or, for some of you, any place. You folks have made yourselves so invisible, a lot of fans think you're some kind of Siegfried & Roy trick. Claire, I saw you and your doggie in Clearwater a few times when the owners were down there being wined and dined. My restaurant buddy, Luigi Gallace, told me you all dined at Villa Gallace with Monty a couple of Marches ago. He said you loved the veal parm.

And I actually sat at the same table in the media lunch room at Jack Russell Stadium one spring with one of you Bucks; can't remember which. Mr. Middleton, I couldn't pick you out of a police lineup. You've aged a little since your Amherst senior picture.

Let me congratulate you all on the new valuation in Forbes magazine. The Phillies' sale price in 1981 was $30 million. Forbes just bumped the ballclub value to $457 million. You Bucks are venture capital investors. Ever imagine in your wildest dreams an investment that would return you 1,400 percent? Harry Truman used to have a sign on his desk that said, "The Buck Stops Here.'' You guys should have one that says, "The Bucks Start Here.''

Now, on a more serious note, you folks realize, of course, you are one loss away from being a national laughingstock. Your "Cheers'' days are about to end because you are the biggest losers and everybody is going to know your names. Everybody but Forbes, that is. In the piece in which they raise the club value to $457 million, they also supplied this bit of crack research: "The Philadelphia Phillies are owned by Bill Giles, who bought them in 1981 for $30 mil.'' I wonder if these financial wizards have heard the news that Nixon resigned.

You obviously went into this in 1981 with eyes wide shut. It seemed like a really neat way to shelter some money and own a piece of the ultimate rich person's toy: a big-league baseball team. In addition to the tax advantages of limited partnership, you got your VIP parking spaces, your seats in the owners' box, that annual spring-training junket where you got to be blown off by Steve Carlton, iced by Mike Schmidt and high-fived by Tug McGraw. And wasn't it great when you went to the World Series in 1983 in only your second full season as owners? Of course, that was the team built by the great baseball men who worked for the Carpenters - that foul-mouthed Paul Owens and loud-mouthed Dallas Green. What a hard-living bunch of lunatics they were.

Then things kind of went to hell. You are riding a postseason 1-for-23 since 1983. Maybe you even noticed, Claire, after your husband passed away and were left with the biggest slice, an estimated paper value of about $180 million. Now you are all about to become the punch line of the sports joke of the year.

And don't throw up your hands and say, "What do we have to do with events that began in 1883?'' Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote that history is the lengthened shadow of a man. Well, the shadow of 10,000 losses and all those baad ballplayers has fallen on your watch. The shadow bypassed Al Reach and Gerry Nugent and William Cox and the rest of the lousy owners before the Carpenters. Early on, the Carpenters believed in all the Amendments to the Constitution but the 14th. They thought Dred Scott was a utility infielder. But when Bob and Ruly finally got it right, they built themselves a helluva ballclub.

Paper profits are nice to look at each month, but they can't buy you a top free-agent pitcher who doesn't mind a 4.50 ERA in a dollhouse of a ballpark where the hitter is Ken and the ballgirl is Barbie. Dave Montgomery and his baseball people have spent money like drunken sailors in a liberty port cathouse. And, like those sailors, all they have to show for it is a series of hangovers. Claire, get Dave to tell you about Freddy Garcia, Pat Burrell, Gavin Floyd and your Sahara minor league system.

So, everybody slip on your T-shirts and get ready to face the music.

Like it or not, Teflonics, you really are the biggest losers, and everybody knows your names.

If these guys do decide to sell, I can think of someone with a ton of cash, has prior baseball franchise ownership experience, and is about to have some free time on his hands:

I don't care what you liberals think, he can own my team any time. He can't be any worse than the current group!

The Scene That Gave Rise To The Whole Thing

For those who don't understand the special humor of my buddy Botts, check out this video:



This explains everything, huh?

We Need To Keep This Guy Around

I don't care that this guy is having a career year at the plate and plays a pretty decent center field...this picture says it all as to why we need to keep Rowand in Philly!

Quite Frankly, I Agree With Stephen A.

Truer words have never been spoken by my favorite media whore Stephen A. Smith:

Howard's a stud, not a one-year wonder. Rollins is playing some exceptional baseball. And Utley is fully worthy of his $85 million deal and fully capable of feeding a city's baseball aspirations (with Howard and Rollins) for years to come.

Any team would want these players. Any team would be respectable with these players. Any team would put quality players around these players and, dare we say, win with these players - even if it meant having to pull off a deal for some quality pitching before the July 31 non-waiver trading deadline expires.

Any team but the Phillies, it seems.

As I'm sure you have guessed, anyone who rips the Phils and their front office is a friend of mine these days...even it means sharing a bed with the likes of Stephen A.

"Bringing The Heat" Coming Soon?

Last night, I had the joy of watching "The Bronx Is Burning" on ESPN, which details the 1977 New York Yankees World Series Championship team and delves into personalities such as Reggie Jackson, George Steinbrenner and Billy Martin. Monday night was the pilot episode, but it seems pretty decent and I'll be back next week. However, it got me thinking....

If there was to be a mini series made about any Philly team, which team would be the most interesting? After thinking about it for only five minutes, I was easily able to come up with a candidate for each team:

1. The 1993 Phillies - This selection is a no brainer. The Phillies have been incredibly dull forever except for this one blip on the radar screen. I'd love to see a series that featured Macho Row (the Dude, Krukker, Dutch, Inky, Hollins, and the Wild Thing), as well as a young Schill. However, such a series would be laughable if it didn't discuss the steroid allegations and how this was the first team to use the Juice en masse.

2. The 1988-1992 Eagles - What team in this city has had a such a collection of personalities? You could spend half a season of episodes on Randall Cunningham and his wacky personality. There was also other mega-personalities such as Reggie White, the late Jerome Brown and Andre Waters, Seth Joyner, Clyde, B&E, Eric Allen, Mike Golic, Keith Jackson and Keith Byars. Is there any surprise that so many of these guys are now commentators? This series could also feature the interplay between Buddy Ryan and the owner we all loved to hate, Norman Braman. Plus, Mark Bowden's book Bringing The Heat is already in place as a template. Seriously, who wouldn't want to see the infamous fight between Wes Hopkin's wife and goomar captured on film?

3. The Broad Street Bullies - This team needs no introduction whatsoever. Bernie, Clarkie, Moose, Big Bird, the Hound, the Hammer, and the Watson Brothers. A wilder group has never been assembled. While such a series would be incredibly interesting to a Flyers nut like myself, I think we've seen it made already....it was called Slap Shot.

4. The 2001 Sixers - For my money, this series would solely revolve around three people, AI, Larry Brown and Pat Croce with an occasional comedic interlude from Dikembe Mutombo. Would anyone need to see any story lines revolving around George Lynch or Eric Snow? Didn't think so.

Since I loved the book Bringing the Heat so much, my vote goes to the 1988-1992 era Eagles. Although, I could be swayed by any of the three other teams. It just shows that even though we are short on titles as Philly phans, we are long on interesting, character laden teams. For that, we should consider ourselves lucky.

All Star Game Tonight!

"This One Counts", huh? Seriously, does anyone give a sh*t? I don't. If there was anything else sports related on the tube tonight, I would be watching it. In fact, I went to a birthing class tonight and didn't bat an eye when I realized I would be missing the beginning of the game while learning about the joys of the child delivery process.

In any event, this game just shows that the front offices of the National League are as inept as those in the NBA's Eastern Conference. How can the talent gap between two leagues be this large, for so long. I don't see the National League closing the gap any time soon.

Fruitless Search

I've spent the past hour trying to find either a video clip or a transcript of David Montgomery's pompous, non informative interview with John Clark last night on NBC10's "Sports Final". Unfortunately, my efforts were in vain as I could not locate anything to share with you guys. Right now, I feel as frustrated as I did after watching the interview.

Basically, Montgomery rolled out one prepared P.R. answer after another. My favorite was his response to the question of how does he explain the team's lack of success the past twenty three years as the Phils have only made the playoffs once. Montgomery explained that if the Phils played any other sport, they would have made the playoffs the last five years. Well, if my aunt had balls, she'd be my uncle.

Sorry Dave, but that is the most ridiculous answer I've ever heard. Seriously, how is that an acceptable response? The Phils have play to by the same rules as everyone else in Major League Baseball. They know what is required of them to make the playoffs. Unfortunately for us as phans, the Phils just won't do enough to get themselves over the top. They skimp in areas (bullpen, bench, and starting pitching) that inevitably become huge eyesores and bite them in the ass.

I shared his response with one reader of this site and he was ok with it. I think the phans in this town are getting numb to this team and have just decided to accept the mediocrity. It's better than losing.

I can't be counted in this category. I won't show up to games just because I want to watch some baseball on a Summer evening. I have a mind of my own and won't be brainwashed like the 40K+ that shows up every night. I refuse to give this ownership group any money out of pocket.
Dave, I beg you....please sell the team. I really can't take your nonsense any more.

The Streak Ends

A Phillie no longer lords over the baseball world as the Home Run Derby Champion. Ryan Howard could not get out of the first round of the derby and could not defend his title.

I don't know about you, but I think this is a good thing. Ryan is just starting to get back into a groove. He did not need this ridiculous derby to ruin his swing like it did to Bobby Abreu in 2005.

A Reprieve From the Governor

Just as the clock was about to strike 10,000 losses, the Phils reprieve from the governor....and don't think Karma didn't play a hand in it.

The Phils won today 8-4 today to salvage a win from their three game series against the Rockies. When the Phils were nursing a 5-4 lead in the 7th inning, a rain storm blew into Denver and delayed the game. While the home team headed off to their club house to avoid the heavy stuff, the Phils did a good deed and helped the grounds crew cover the field. Just goes to show that good things can happen to good people.

In any event, I'm glad the Phils won and put off their mile stone loss for another day. I hope the 10,000th loss is a prime time story during the All Star break. Maybe the current owners will be so embarrassed that they will feel compelled to sell the team.

Can we be that lucky?

A Tad Bit Flaky

In case you missed it, the Daily News ran an interesting article on Phils' first round pick, Joe Savery. However, I don't know if the article was all that interesting or it was just a real slow news day. In any event, I was slightly amused by the following comment from Savery:

"I'm a sports-management major, but I like to say I major in life. You can only have one major, but I took a lot of courses. Education. Religion. Economics. I've taken them all."

He majors in life? A 21 year old guy from Rice University majors in life??? He can't be srious, can he? Someone might want to double check and make this Texas native is not some flake from California. I've always heard that lefties are a bit strange. I guess this is more evidence of that premise.

You Da Man!

Thanks to my main man, Andy G, for fixing my computer last evening. He helped me get about another six months out of my old dog computer. Thanks, bro!

Less Than 60 Days Away....

Watching this brings back a ton of great memories. Can't wait for opening night (8/30 against the immortal Bison of Buffalo University) to get here!

Happy Birthday America!

Hope everyone had a great 4th of July.

To everyone that took off Thursday and Friday....You totally suck!

Don't Know About You Guys, But I'm Excited

Check out this video: Flyers Welcome Briere, Timonen, and Hartnell



Add to My Profile More Videos

Can't wait for hockey season. Let's Go Flyers!

Was This Necessary?

I know I'm a few days late on this, but....



Sure, Shane Victorino shows on this play why he is the "Flyin' Hawaiian", but what was this guy thinking? There was no way he was going to catch this ball. To me, this move was a little ridiculous. He risked serious injury and Lord knows we don't have the depth to replace this guy. However, I suppose this is what a team has to resort to when you have absolutely no confidence in your bullpen.

Eagles Question Marks: Part II

Ok, I realize I skipped a week, but let's get back to some unanswered questions currently facing the Eagles as they head into 2007. I was planning on talking about how we are in the midst of a dead period of Philly sports as we're still a month away from Eagles training camp, the Flyers and Sixers drafts have past and the Phils are about to fade out of contention yet again, but I realize that it pretty freakin' boring, so 'll do what every Philly sports outlet does at this time of the year...turn to the Birds

After last year's defensive struggles from about week 7 through the playoff loss in N'Awlins, it became quite evident that the linebackers were flat out just not stout enough to stop the run. So, the question becomes.......

HAVE THE EAGLES' CHANGES AT LB IMPROVED THEIR RUN DEFENSE?

I think we can answer this question with an emphatic YES! Just the fact that Dhani Jones, his bow ties, and air banjo have left town would suffice for me, but the Birds added former Pro Bowler, Takeo Spikes, at the WILL LB spot (who should be a major improvement - if healthy- over last year's starters) and will have Chris Gocong, Stewart Bradley and Tank Daniels competing at the SAM Spot. If you watched the Birds the last couple years, there is no way any of these guys can be worse than the non-existent Bow Tie Man. Obviously, the new starters at both outside spots will be key to this year's run defense. However, since the new starters are much bigger and more aggressive players than their predecessors, I would be shocked if the Bird are not stronger at both outside line backer spots than they were last year.

Plus, the plan is currently to spell Jeremiah Trotter early and often at MLB with last year's WILL starter, Omar Gaither, to keep Trot fresh for when things matter most. Unlike most people, I have not given up totally on Matt McCoy. Most people forget that he was effective early in the year when he was still fresh. If he is kept to limited snaps this year, he has the opportunity to be effective in limited playing time.

Of course, most of the defense's success against the run will be dictated by the play of the d-line, which is another topic for another day. However, I believe this group of linebackers will not compound the problems and be totally nonexistent against the run the way last year's group was.

So there you have it. I'm very bullish on this group to be much better than last year's crew.

Random Thoughts

I have a lot to catch up on so here are some quick random thoughts:

1. Phils beat up by the Mets....Yeah, it sucked to see the Phils knocked around by the Mets, but what did you expect? Hamels lost and the Phils barely had a chance to win games started by Durbin and Happ. I'm not all that alarmed by these losses. On the bright side, the Hendrick kid seems pretty serviceable. However, they still need one more starter. I surely don't want to see Durbin on the mound again anytime soon.

In case anyone was wondering...I predicted that the Phils would go 4-6 over the Cards, Reds and Mets series. I was one game off. Not too shabby, huh?

2. The Flyers add Briere and get rid of Pitkanen....Homer is at it again. He's totally overhauled the lineup in a very short period of time. This team is truly a playoff contender next year. I'm not totally in love with Briere, but he is huge improvement over what is currently on the roster. Plus, what is up with giving the guy an 8 year deal? I know the contract is front loaded and it was the only way we were signing the guy, but jeez....this contract has major potential to really look bad in a couple years. Plus, look at this picture:

This is our savior? Does he scare you in the slightest? He looks like my friggin' pizza delivery guy!

Also, the Pitkanen trade can do nothing but help. Although, the Fly guys may need one other defenseman that can move the puck. By the way, how do the Rangers have enough cash to sign Gomez AND Drury? I thought this league had a salary cap.

3. The Sixers completed their draft....Don't know about you guys, but I was seriously underwhelmed. The big white kid will be a stiff and who knows about the first pick. Sounds like he has a great upside, but he adds to the glut at the 2 and 3. (Does this signal a trade? I sure hope so). Anyhow, I wish they kept the 2nd round Ukranian center. He looked pretty ferocious playing against a bunch of dudes named Sergei and Ivan.

4. Nascar season reaches the half way point....Is this they year Gordo gets one for the thumb? Who knows what can happen once he gets to the chase, but he has to be the favorite as we head towards the second half of the year. By the way, is anyone else shocked to see how well Martin Truex, Jr is doing?

Howard Is Getting That Lovin' Feelin' Back...but Bullpen Blows

On a day when the Big Man pronounced at an awards banquet that his swing "was coming back", he crushed an absolute moon shot to get him to the 100 HR plateau faster than any other player in major league history. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough as the bullpen reared its ugly head and gave up a three run lead in the 7th and then gave the lead back in the 8th after the Phils valiantly fought back to tie the game.

Nights like this almost...and I repeat almost, has me seeing my buddy George's side of things. I'm starting to like this vagabond cast of Phils that surrounds Howard, Utley and Hamels. It seems like these kids and nobodies are doing their best to right the wrongs of our brutal front office. It is almost comical that this team has $17 million in salary (Burrell, Helms, and Barajas) sitting on the bench while guys like Dobbs, Bourn, Ruiz and Nunez contribute to this team's success.

Will it last? I doubt it. It's hard to believe that the nondescript players which have been carrying this team at times will keep things up.

Sorry for the lack of posts lately. I've been really busy with quite a few things lately. Things should calm down early next week...I hope.

Just One Month Away.....

Training Camp is only one short month way. To whet your appetite, I provide you with this:



God, I can't wait for football season. The Phillies have sufficiently annoyed me and we haven't even reached the All Star Break.

Taking Shots At A Philadelphia Institution

In case you were listening to 610 this evening and heard the debate regarding whether Harry Kalas should be put out to pasture, here is the article from Philadelphia Magazine causing all the ruckus.

It’s the bottom of the fourth, two outs and a man on first, with the Phillies losing to the San Francisco Giants on a rain-soaked afternoon at Citizens Bank Park. Crack! The ball sails to center field, and if it’s possible to enjoy listening to a home run more than seeing one, that’s because the man with the call is Harry Kalas. “Home run Ryan Howard!” he yells with those raspy, resonant pipes. The Phils take the lead. It’s a perfect moment, save for one detail — Howard struck out earlier that inning. Aaron Rowand hit the dinger.

Kalas quickly recovered. But this season, such gaffes have become harder to ignore, as blown calls, forgotten names and pauses on close plays have led to whispers among local sports-media types that it may be time for Kalas to hit the showers. “If you’re hearing things are slipping,” says a local broadcaster, “you’re right.” One sports analyst puts it a bit more bluntly: “Harry’s a shell of himself.”

Naturally, no one wants to tell a legend it’s time to go. (Just ask Penn State.) Such reluctance speaks to Kalas’s status as a sports god here, as big as or bigger than most of the athletes he’s covered in his 36-year career. It’s also a result of his public falling-out with on-air sidekick Chris Wheeler in 2004. The upshot: Wheeler was branded as a schemer gunning for Kalas’s job. Unfair as that was, Wheeler’s popularity plummeted, and a lesson was learned: Players and managers may come and go, but Harry is untouchable.

Kalas, 71, says he isn’t considering retirement. “I feel good,” he says. “If it becomes a grind, then maybe I’ll think about it. But that hasn’t happened, knock on wood.” While he has plenty of post-baseball options — an NFL Films insider describes him as “still at the top of his game” as the voice of Inside the NFL — there’s no pressure coming from the Phillies. “Harry leaves when Harry’s ready,” declares Rob Brooks, the team’s broadcasting manager. “He’s still having a great time, and we’re happy to have him.”

Somehow, that’s reassuring. But there’s a lesson to be learned from beloved New York Mets play-caller Ralph Kiner, 84, now afflicted with Bell’s palsy. The fuzzy nostalgia of hearing his voice is tempered by the pathos of his slurred speech. Kalas appears to be in great health. But the day may come sooner rather than later when he’ll have to make the toughest call of his career.

Sorry, but this article is pure blasphemy. How dare this writer suggest that Harry the K step down! Harry and the Phanatic are about the only things that have consistently delivered for this franchise. He should be able to retire when he wants.

However, I will admit that his innings be scaled back. Scott Framzke isn't bad on the radio and should be given a shot on TV. This would let Harry get a rest here and there. Such a move would serve him well and energize him for the key parts of the game.

This town already screwed over my favorite all time Philly announcer, Gene Hart. Let's not see it happen again.

The Debate Rages On....

For those of you who have a problem with the sport of Hockey, I dare you to watch this video and tell me this is not a great sport....



Also, check out this hysterical article by the Sports Guy detailing the NHL Hockey Draft this past Friday. Here are some of the highlights:

4:22: Here's a cool wrinkle for the first round: Before every pick, each GM walks up to the stage flanked by four cronies, then stands in front of the podium and announces his pick. Imagine if the NBA did this and we could see the likes of Elgin Baylor and Kevin McHale announcing their own picks? Can we make this happen?

Anyway, Chicago GM Dale Tallon is "proud" to introduce tiny Patrick Kane as his No. 1 pick. This kid looks like an altar boy. I'm not kidding -- he actually looks like an altar boy. I hope his tremendous upside potential involves puberty. More importantly, what the hell happened to the NHL? As if things weren't already bad enough, the league's No. 1 overall pick is an undersized American who looks like the third singer in a boy band? Can we start sending them FEMA money or something?

4:27: Flyers GM Paul Holmgren looks exactly like Juergen Prochnow. I don't know what this means. He uses the No. 2 pick on American LW James vanRiemsdyk, whose last name sounds like a Dutch porn movie. Does every NHL lottery pick look like an extra from "Dead Poets Society" or was it just these first two?

4:28: Announcer No. 2 tells us, "He's a good, strong, solid NHL player, and, uh, they've got a good player here." These are the moments when you appreciate Mel Kiper Jr. They don't happen often. Still waiting for graphics telling me the names of these announcers.

4:31: All right, we've officially reached the point when this draft is much funnier on TV than it could ever be in print. We just had this exchange:

--Announcer No. 1 (excited): "[vanRiemsdyk] developed really quickly, he really came on in the past year. How long has he been on your radar?"

--Holmgren (monotone): "Uh ... [thinking] ... for a long time."

Seriously, what's not to love about the NHL?

By the way, I'm not enamored with the Flyers draft. It seems like someone must have let Clarkie in the war room because just about every kid they drafted was an overgrown North American kid. I guess Homer missed the memo that the NHL is now emphasizing speed and skill.

Intriguing Friday

This Friday is shaping up to be quite interesting for yours truly.

On a personal note, my crew and I return to Scotland Run to partake in the joys of the Par & Bar. I can hardly wait. My buddy (and expert golf club maker) Muller is making his maiden voyage. Should be a good time. We'll probably do another one in July. Once we figure out a date, I'll post it.

However, even more interesting to me is this Friday's NHL draft where your Philadelphia Flyers hold the 2nd overall pick. There are rumors all over place. I've heard that the Flyers could use the pick on a potential stud center, could trade down for additional picks, or package that pick in an effort to trade for a top line center. The possibilities are endless and you can count me as intrigued.

Plus, there are all kinds of rumors that the Orange & Black are about to finally give up on the mercurial Joni Pitkanen, whom Glen Macnow aptly compared to Pat Burrell in terms of being a highly talented player that fails to progress due to making the same mistake over and over again, and potentially trade him to Edmonton for a roster player and a package of picks. There is also the impending free agency binge which is due to start on July 1st and the rumors are rampant that the Fly Guys are going to go after top line centers Danny Briere or Scott Gomez. Personally, I'd prefer Gomez as he's more of a playmaker and more phyiscal than Briere. Plus, signing him would weaken the Devils.

Oh...almost forgot, the Phils continue their path towards mediocrity as they open a three game series with the Red Birds in St. Louis. Remember, I see them losing 2 out of 3. I also discussed gambling methods with Mr. Nascar and he informs me that betting the money line is the way I can make money on my premonition that the Phils go 4 and 6 over the next ten. The question is...do I have the balls to do it? Not yet, I'm afraid.

By the way, the new GQ is coming out with a layout of Jessica Biel. Click here now, and thank me later. Here's a preview:

Yowza!!!!

David Akers' Favorite Pizza Delivery Boy

This item on Koy Detmer's part time college job was buried in Jones' insightful commentary disagreeing with my opinion on the effectiveness of the Birds' offense next year. I just thought it was too good to be ignored. Enjoy:

Koy took on a part time job when he turned 16 (while in high school) as a deliveryman for Pizza Hut. He kept this job until the day he was drafted by the Philadelphia Eagles.

I always knew that Koy was a bit strange, but are you telling me that he needed he needed to work at Pizza Hut while on a full ride at University of Colorado? On the bright side, now that Koy no longer has a job with the Birds, he has some experience in the pizza delivery business to fall back upon.

Now, Go Get Your Shine Box!

I'm not sure if any of you care about this one, but my dad is laid up after having back surgery this week. Tonight, during one of his more lucid moments, he told me that he is considering shaving his moustache. He's had one just about my entire life. I really had trouble picturing him without it.

However, it then hit me like a bolt of lightning. I quickly realized that without the moustache he will be a dead ringer for Frank Vincent (aka Phil Leotardo of the Sopranos and Billy Bats of Goodfellas.)

Now, I'm actually hoping he does shave his moustache so I can greet him with Goodfellas and/or Sopranos lines. That will be fun.

See, these are the ridiculous things you think of at 12:28 am on a school night.

For Entertainment Purposes Only

Recently, I told my buddy Biggsy that the Phils are so predictable, you can set your watch to them. I later said that I wish I only had the balls to gamble on these guys because there is no way you could lose money on them if you could find a formula where your winnings were based upon being correct over a period of games, not for a specific games. I think you can make such bets if you use a money line, but I'm far from an expert on these topics. I'd ask my brother in law, but he is the biggest mush in the history of sports gambling. (He even blames himself for killing Dale Earnhardt, Sr as he placed a bet on him the only time he wagered on NASCAR.)

Anyhow, the Phils are now 37-35 and lost 4 out of 6 against the best of the AL Central after taking 9 out of the 12 games preceding them. So, where do the Phils go from here? Well, they are now down two starters after Fat Ass Lieber rolled an ankle seemingly walking off the mound. As a result, it would appear that they are due to go at least 2 games under to put them back at .500. Let's take a look at the next 10 games:

June 22-24 at St Louis - The Phils never play well in St. Louis. In fact, I think this is the reason I hate St. Louis. It always looked so freakin' hot when the Phils played them at Busch Stadium and they always friggin' lost. Even though the Cards are having a hard time defending their fluky crown, I still see them taking 2 out of 3 from our battered Phils.

June 26-28 CINCINATTI - The Reds are flat out brutal, so you would guess that the Phils will take 2 out of 3, right? But would the opposite result surprise anyone?

June 29-July 1 - NY METS (includes a double header on the 29th) - I'll give them a split of the double header, but then I see the Mets taking the next two as pay back for the Phils sweeping them earlier in the month.

There you go....they will go 4-6 over the next 10 and drop us back to .500. If anyone can figure out how to make money on this scenario, please let me know because I have a kid on the way and the extra money would come in handy.

Eagles Question Marks: Part I

Frankly, I'm a bit bored talking about the Phils and their predictable struggles, all the while searching for anything else involving other Philly related sports that may interest you, my loyal reader(s). So in that vane (or is vein/vain), I decided we should start tackling the various question marks facing the Birds as they head towards 2007. I think you guys will like this new feature. Feel free to disagree with me in the comments section. I want to know what you guys think.

Our first question mark is:

WILL THE OFFENSE SUFFER WITH KEVIN CURTIS REPLACING DONTE' STALLWORTH AT WIDE RECEIVER?

If you ask Dave Spadaro, Kevin Curtis is the second coming of Lance Alworth. However, I'm not 100% sold on this move. In my mind, the decision to let Donte' walk in favor of Curtis has created two questions: (1) can the offense still run at high octane with Curtis in the starting lineup; and (2) is Reggie Brown ready to be a #1 receiver?

With Stallworth in the lineup last year, all the receivers were properly slotted. Stallworth was the #1 target and legit home run hitter; Reggie Brown was a very good #2 receiver that could feast on a team's second best cover guy; Hank Baskett could come out of the slot and over match DB's with his size and athleticism; and G Lew and Avant only had to pitch in where necessary.

With Brown being elevated to the #1 guy and Curtis stepping in at the #2, you have a couple issues to consider. Can Reggie consistently beat #1 corners to give D Mac a reliable target? I think the answer to this one is a cautiously optimistic yes. People forget that last year Stallworth missed his fair share of games, and not to get all Spadaro on you, but the stats revealed that the offense hardly skipped a beat. Therefore, Reggie has previously proven that he can be a go to guy, but now he has to show that he can do it week in and week out. I believe he will step it up and become a decent #1 guy. Is he a T.O., Randy Moss or Marvin Harrison type #1 guy? No, but he is a good enough #1 to help you win and isn't that all we ask for?

Now, as for Kevin Curtis, I am not as confident. He isn't the biggest guy in the world and he is more quick than fast. He has also been a #3 guy during his career with the Rams that was consistently matched up against #3 corners or safeties (i.e., people he should beat.) The question then becomes, can he beat starting caliber corners in the NFL? I say he can, but I don't think he'll be any where close to a dominant guy. Will he be as bad as Thrash and Pinkston? Absolutely not, but the #2 receiver spot will not be as strong as last year.

In essence, I think the Birds take a small step back at both the #1 and #2 receiver spots, but I think the year 1 to year 2 improvement of Hank Baskett will offset that deficiency. Plus, should McNabb stay healthy, it is a virtual certainty that L.J. Smith will be a bigger part of the offense (as he was prior to #5 going down in Week 11) and we all expect to see the run emphasized a bit more than it was last year pre Garcia.

Therefore, to answer my own question, I don't see the offense being affected by Kevin Curtis signing. I just don't foresee him being a game changer that we saw with Stallworth last year.

Reason 6,397 Why I Can't Stand The Phils

I ripped Marcus Hayes recently for supporting the Phils, but he's finally turned things around and has been ripping the front office every chance he's had. I now thoroughly enjoy his work.

Here's the latest debacle reported by Hayes in today's Daily News surrounding the Phils and their inept, beleaguered front office: the Joe Borowski mess from last offseason. The Phils had him signed to a 2 year deal, but Borowski failed a physical and the deal was off. Borowski then took his services to Cleveland where he has saved 20 games out of 22 chance. I guess we didn't need a guy like him in our bullpen.

Anyhow, Borowski had some interesting things to say over the whole ordeal:

"Something that was supposedly hush-hush comes out the same day it happens," said Borowski, who allowed that it didn't necessarily have to be the Phillies who leaked the diagnosis from team physician Dr. Michael Ciccotti.

The Phillies acknowledged that they agreed to keep things quiet and say that they did not address Borowski's failed physical until after it was reported and attributed to an anonymous source.

They disagree with Borowski's version of other events: "All of a sudden, you come here and try to undercut," he said. "Then you hear that other teams are getting involved, you start upping your price again . . .

"They kept coming back with more and more and more and more and more. They came bottom of the barrel, then the next one was more and the next one was more and the next one was more."

At that point, was there a chance Borowski would accept any deal from the Phils?

"None," he said. "It left a bad taste in my mouth."

Use mouthwash, said Phillies assistant general manager Ruben Amaro Jr.

Team policy is to not detail negotiations, Amaro said, "But we will acknowledge we did have further discussions with him after the diagnosis from Dr. Ciccotti. I will take exception with how he's describing it to you. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. We still wanted the guy. We just wanted a little bit more protection."

Borowski also was critical of the methods used by Ciccotti in his exam: "My physical was just the doctor pretty much hanging off my arms and not moving me whatsoever."

"With all due respect to the player, he's free to speak as he sees fit," Amaro said. "We are fully supportive of Dr. Ciccotti and his ability to diagnose our players and free agents. We are very confident in his findings."

When Borowski signed a 1-year, $4.25 million deal with the Indians and reported for spring training, he found himself awash in former Phillies: David Dellucci, Jason Michaels, Roberto Hernandez, Aaron Fultz.

"Some of them came up to me and said, 'You should be happy,' " Borowski said.

He is.

Borowski has converted 20 of 22 save chances. His earned run average of 6.33 is skewed by two poor appearances. In save situations, he has a 3.38 ERA.

"Actually, it worked out for the better," Borowski said. "I'm on a first-place team, everything is going great; great group of guys, great organization. I think it worked out for the best."

The sad thing about this whole mess is that Ruben Amaro, Jr will likely be the GM when Gillick is finally put out to pasture. So get used to gaffes like this.

By the way, when is the last time you ever heard anyone refer to the Phils as a first class organization?

Well, This Should Change Things Around

After seeing Boston and Chicago use the Curse of The Bambino and the Curse of the Billy Goat, respectively, as a crutch to blame past failures upon, certain sports phans in Philly created the ridiculous Curse of Billy Penn to explain why we have gone without a Worlds Championship team since 1983. Well, it looks like the Powers That Be in the City of Philadelphia have seen to it that the Curse is wiped away. Check this out:

Keeping alive a centuries-old tradition - with a Philadelphia twist - a beam was hoisted to the highest point of Comcast Center today, topping off Philadelphia's new tallest skyscraper.

There was a small tree at one end of the beam, which had been signed by workers and those gathered for the ceremony, and an American flag at the other.

Between them was a statue of William Penn, the city's founder. There is a myth that Philadelphia's sports teams will not win a championship as long as a building "rises above Billy Penn" on City Hall, said Bill Hankowsky, chief executive officer of Liberty Property Trust, the Malvern company that is building Comcast Center.

He was referring to the controversy two decades ago when One Liberty Place, also built by Liberty, became the first to break that barrier.

"We don't believe in the myth, but to be safe we've added the statue of Billy Penn," Hankowsky said.

Great. I can rest easy tonight. A title must surely be coming right around the corner now that these knuckleheads added a statue of some dead guy to the top of this new skyscraper.

Back To Reality

Once again, the Phils show they are a .500 team. Nothing more, nothing less. Just accept it and you will feel much better about things.

Over the last four games, it has become clear that the Phils don't have enough in the lineup, in the starting staff or in the 'pen to play with the big boys. Some of you just accept it and say "I like baseball and I'll just root for the home team come hell or high water."

Eff that. We deserve better. We deserve a GM that will make daring moves like the Flyers made today and won't make trades without getting the player reviewed over by a team physician. We deserve a team that will make that extra move when they are close.

Frankly, we deserve much better than Montgomery, Cholly, and Gillick.

*************************

By the way, I saw an alarming stat this evening during the inning and a half that I watched this evening: Cole Hamels has given up the most gopher balls in the NL. I guess a lot of guess have guessed right on his change up.

Also, I wouldn't expect the Phils to do much better over the next two games against the Tribe. The Indians are sending out lefty starters the next two games and we know how much success the Phils have had against southpaws so far this season.

Creative General Managing 101

I know half of you that read this blog could give a crap about the Flyers and the NHL, but the trade and inevitable signings that new Flyers' GM, Paul Holmgren pulled off today is about the most creative, aggressive, proactive move we've seen in this town for years. In fact, we've haven't seen such forward thinking out of the Phillies and Sixers in more than two freakin' decades!

In case you missed it, the Flyers traded the #23 pick in this year's pitiful draft to Nashville for the exclusive rights to pending unrestricted free agents, Kimo Timmonen, a puck moving defenseman, and Scott Hartnell, a big 25 year old winger with good hands around the net. Reports indicate that the Flyers moved quickly after the trade and signed both to six year contracts before they could reach the open market and have given away a first round draft pick for nothing.

Will these moves alone make the Flyers contenders? No. However, these moves do make the team more inviting to other potential free agents and if the Flyers can sign a top line center, then watch out. This team will once again be a perennial playoff contender.

Overall, you have to give Holmgren credit. He took over a team that was ill-suited to compete in today's NHL and laden will salary cap mistakes like Mike Rathje, Kyle Calder and Derian Hatcher, shed all the dead weight and looks to be on his way of having a team that can regain its spot as one of the NHL's elite teams.

In any event, I just wish the Phils for once could show savvy like this. Please Lord...just once, please let the Phils snooker some poor unsuspecting team.

No Longer In Her Mitts

I realize I post this item at the risk of this blog looking like a gossip column, but this story from today's Daily News certainly piqued my interest:

SOCCER PHENOM Heather Mitts finally revealed Friday that she and Eagles quarterback A.J. Feeley split up months ago.
But the U.S. Women's Soccer star says they may be in the process of reconciling.

"We broke up in March and have been free to do whatever," Mitts confirmed. In April, she laughed off rumors that the couple had parted.

"It's been hard for both of us with the long distance and other factors. Everybody makes mistakes and we love each other very much," Mitts e-mailed us Friday. They're getting together this week to "figure out what's best for us in the long run."

With his freedom, Feeley has been spied of late making out with hotties at La Costa in Sea Isle City and picking up girls at the Public House Logan Square.

Wow...this one is a surprise. No, I'm not surprised that AJ and Heather Mitts split up, but the what the eff is a millionaire like AJ doing picking up chicks at La Costa? I can understand picking up broads at the Public House, but if you are going to Sea Isle to find women, shouldn't he at least go to the O.D.?

Ok, let's get back to the sports talk.

In any event, here's a picture of Heather Mitts to get you going this morning...by the way...it's kind of NSFW.

Somebody Please Explain This To Me....

Yeah, I know I'm a day late on this, but....

Can someone please explain why Phillies phans gave a standing O to Jim Thome yesterday upon his return to Philly. I agree that the Thome experience was a pleasant one and he was one of the few athletes in recent memory that did not rip the city on his way out the door, but a standing O for a guy that didn't lead us to a post season birth? Really? I don't understand.

I would have been for some polite applause, but a standing O was totally out of question. I'm guessing people forget that Thome is the sole reason that we have Uncle Cholly as a manager. He was Thome's boy. Kind of like the Tito Francona/Curt Schilling relationship.

In any event, it wasn't a horrible thing that the phans did and it can't hurt in the karma department, but I'd love to hear why anyone thinks this reaction was necessary.

How Sweep It Is! Part II

Great job by the Phils sweeping a home series from the Pale Sox punctuated by today's 8-3 win. They are now a season high 4 games over .500, which is surprising considering how bad they started and how inconsistent they've been at times this year. Plus, I also heard today that the Phils have the best record in the National League since their horrid 4-9 start.

I would really like to fully throw myself into this team, but I can't trust this organization to not eff things up. If they do somehow make it to the post season, it will be solely in spite of the GM and ownership, instead of because of them.

Plus, I'm holding off on making a decision on these guys until they finish the next six games against Cleveland and Detroit. If they go 3-3 against these guys, that would be a great result.

Until then, I suppose it is ok to get a little excited about big victories spear headed by clutch hits like Aaron Rowand's grand slam. Savor moments like these. The Phils don't supply that many.

Snuke In The Snizz

Tonight, South Park reminded us why it is one of the best comedies in the last decade. The spoof on 24 was simply fantastic. For all I know, this was a repeat of an episode shown a couples months ago, but it was god damn funny. (Editor's Note: It was aired 3/28/07. Way to be on top of things, Tone). Here's a clip from CNN:



Anyhow, this show is always fresh and original. It almost never disappoints.

Quick Hit Thoughts For A Rainy Tuesday

Yeah, I'm too lazy to write a full post, so here's some things that have struck me as interesting lately:

- D Mac Comes Back To Practice: This is fantastic news, but is he rushing back a bit too soon? I'd rather see him come back in Carson Palmer fashion, rather than Daunte Culpepper (Johnny Gold's all time favorite fantasy football QB). Plus, don't the Eagles want to make sure to take it easy with D Mac so that he goes out for the year in the usual week 10 game instead of during something called OTA's.

- Freddy Garcia is Done For The Year: Now that Freddy is about to go under the knife for his frayed labrum and spare us with suffering through his lackluster pitching efforts, he has officially taken the all time worst Philadelphia "Freddy" title from Freddy Mitchell. I think we can all agree, this is no small accomplishment.

By the way, check out this article from Bill Conlin where he takes the Phils to task for not having Garcia undergo an MRI before agreeing to the deal. This is just more evidence why I hate the Phils' front office. Christ, according to former Birds' doctor, Art Bartolozzi, the Eagles had six different doctors look at Corey Simon's shoulder before using a first round pick on him....and that was for a DT, who last time I checked isn't required to have a strong fastball as part of his repertoire.

- David Chase Speaks: Unfortunately, he doesn't reveal a whole lot about the Soprano's finale in this exclusive interview with the Newark Star Ledger.

In any event, I'm fully behind the theory that the last scene is just a microcosm of how he will live out the rest of his days....scared, anxious, and unable to trust anyone except his immediate family. I kind of like the screen going black as indicative of us as the audience being whacked. At least in my mind, I can justify that ending...I don't like it, but I can accept it.

- Phils Win First Two Games of Pale Sox Series: Seriously, who cares other than my buddy George? If we've learned anything from this team, they will lose tomorrow (with some goober named Kyle Kendrick making his first Major League start) and probably the first two games of the next series.

- Phils Are Only 14 Away From 10,000 Franchise Losses: I can't wait to see how this one is played in the National Media.

- U.S. Open at Oakmont: Lefty has a bad wrist, but has decided to play. I've been ripping the guy for having no heart for years, but I think this "macho" decision is a bad call. Wait to you see the ruff at this place. He better put every drive on the Shawn Bradley skinny fairways or there's a good shot he makes this injury worse.

By the way, I read that Oakmont has a 288 yard Par 3....the longest Par 3 in Major Tourney history. Can't wait to see how the pros play this hole.

- Sixers Audition A Small Army For The Draft: Yawn...who cares.

- Paris Hilton: I can't explain why, but I kind of feel sorry for her now.

- Hysterical Japanese Video Sent In By My Buddy Aran: Enjoy, give it until the 90 second mark.....

We Know Its A Repost... - Watch more free videos

Totally and Utterly Pissed Off

I don't know who to be more mad at....David Chase or the Phils.

I'm going with David Chase. That finale was ridiculous. I can't believe there was not more finality then what this episode provided. Instead of providing any sense of resolution, Chase provided an ending scene which prompted more questions than answers. I'm left grasping at straws with this one and having an empty feeling.

I also wonder how many of you also thought something happened to your television?

Anyhow, the theory that seems to be the most prevalent on the internet is that Tony is dead and the reason the screen went totally black was that was the instant he was killed. People also claim that you can see it on Meadow's face as she rushes up to the restaurant. I also see reference to the flash back in last week's episode taken from the first week where Tony tells Bobby that when you get whacked, you never hear them coming and everything goes black. I don't know. If that's what David Chase intended, fine. I hope he's proud of himself.

I'm just pissed. I really wanted this series to end on a better note, but I guess David Chase in his infinite wisdom decided it would be a bigger artistic masterpiece to end it like he did. I just hope he realizes he's alienated me and about a bazillion other potential viewers to whatever project he decides to put out there.

Although, since we're all Philadelphia sports phans, I suppose we should be accustomed to such disappointment.

Spadaro At His Best

No one, I mean no one, circles the wagons quite like Dave Spadaro when it comes to protecting the moves by Eagles management that become questioned by the masses. In the past, he's talked up Matt McCoy, Nate Wayne, Dhani Jones, and Todd Pinkston as big time players. Needless to say, he's had a ton of practice of defending bizarre moves.

Anyhow, here's his latest foray into the propaganda market:

They are quick and they are fast and they have size and they have experience and they are young and they are ... well, they are the Eagles wide receivers and they are always a topic of conversation.
Are they good enough, collectively, to beat any defense in the land? Are they good enough to make the big catch when the Eagles need it?

Are they ... what are they?

Instead of offering you a paper-thin theory, I went to the experts. The Eagles' cornerbacks have a unique look on things here.

It makes sense, doesn't it? The wide receivers work against the cornerbacks and the safeties every day. The d-backs get to know every move Reggie Brown makes, and they understand how far Jason Avant has come in a year's time and they know better than anyone out there how Kevin Curtis looks in the Eagles offensive system.

So?

"They don't have Pro Bowl names or anything like that and that is a fact, and I truly hope people overlook our wide receivers," said cornerback Lito Sheppard. "They're going to make plays. We are not going to lose any productivity.

WR Kevin Curtis has his sights set on a big season in the offense
"We have some speed out there, we have some big guys and we have some combinations that are going to be difficult to match up against."

Said fellow starting cornerback Sheldon Brown: "I think they are an underrated group with a lot of ability and talent. I think it is a group that may never get the respect they deserve, but the only think that matters is that we win, and we will win with these receivers."

Reggie Brown and Kevin Curtis are the starters, but there are other receivers who are going to get plenty of time and, in theory, there are jobs open. There are five players atop the rotation that seem fairly certain to be around in September: The two starters plus Jason Avant and Greg Lewis and Hank Baskett, in no particular order. There are others to consider strongly, including Jeremy Bloom, who is having a very good spring, and Bill Sampy, a young second-year player ready to make a real push.

But for the purposes of this analysis, let's stick to to the first five players.

And the cornerbacks are impressed.

"First of all, Reggie Brown moves like Marvin Harrison (Colts receiver), to be honest," said Brown. "He looks like Harrison does when I study him on tape. The only thing he needs is to get more balls thrown his way. He will put up the numbers. Reggie is very quick, has good hands. Reggie can get down the field on you, too. You saw him do that last year, so that isn't a question to me."

Said cornerback Joselio Hanson: "I think they've got everything over there. They have a lot of speed, they have size, they run good routes and they have big guys."

Curtis is a mystery to most Eagles fans. He was the third receiver in St. Louis, playing behind stars Torry Holt and Isaac Bruce. Is Curtis ready to be a full-time starter and deliver full-time starter numbers?

The cornerbacks all agreed that Curtis has what it takes. This is what they said:

"I think he's faster than he is quick, but he's quick, though. He can get up the field on you." said Hanson. "He's smart, too. He can get a good release on you, then stack you and try to get you on his back. He's crafty, a veteran."

Said Brown of Curtis: "He's fast and quick. Don't get me wrong, I thought Donte' (Stallworth) was good, too. I think Kevin is a legit wide receiver."

"I know the situation in St. Louis," said Sheppard of Curtis. "He played behind great players there and he put up some numbers. The guy is going to get a lot of chances here, too. He runs good routes, had good hands and he will get by you, too."

It's going to be interesting to see how the Eagles use the personnel. You can expect a lot of different combinations and that is going to help the offense, The Eagles like to mix and match their personnel and create favorable matchups.

You will also see Brian Westbrook out wide, in the slot, everywhere in the formation.

"We have every kind of receiver," said cornerback Will James. "We have small, quick ones. We have tall, fast ones. We have strong ones. So it's like anything we need at any time versus any system, we can implement that.

"What's the word I'm looking for? Diversity. That's it. That's what we have."

There are some who talk about a "true No. 1 receiver" and wonder if the Eagles have that kind of player. Certainly, they had that player a few years ago in Terrell Owens. None of these receivers is as talented, and none of them needs the ball as much as Owens needed it.

The Eagles believe, though, that they have plenty of capable weapons and that the offense is going to move the ball in a variety of ways this season.

"I disagree that we don't have a No. 1 receiver," said Brown. "When you have Brian Westbrook on the field, you have a player you have to cover. A No. 1 receiver is someone who has a very good No. 2 receiver, and we have that. We have players out there, a lot of firepower."

Did Dave make you feel any better about the current state of our WR's? Didn't think so.

How Sweep It Is!

Yes, I know what you're thinking....How can I get excited about these guys after I've spent the last two months ripping them. Well, you don't get to use that headline very often with the Phils, so I figured I'd jump on it while the gettin' is good.

I think I'm shocked as the rest of you that the Phils pulled this game out. I really didn't expect much in the 9th. I even turned the game off. However, I pleasantly surprised to see that our worst hitter crushed a huge home run off Philly Phan Hater, Billy Wagner. Eat shit, Billy. I hope you have a one night stand with the recently released Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan and contracts a bad case of the clap, V.D. and crabs.

Also, is it any wonder that this extra inning win occurred after Uncle Cholly got thrown out of the game? I think not. Removing Cholly from the decision making equation in a close game is never a bad thing.

Anyhow, with this sweep , the Phils have a real shot to establish a real winning streak as they head out to KC to take on the 22-39 Royals. If they fail to take at least two out of three from these guys, then this season holds no hope whatsoever. They will have confirmed that they are nothing more than a .500 outfit with holes all over the roster.

In any event, this team still annoys me to death. I'm planning on writing an article rating the worst owners in my Philly Sports life time. Since the teams haven't changed hands all that much over the past 35 years, the list is short, but illustrious.

Ok, Let's See A Show Of Hands

How many of you guys are back on the bandwagon after the last two dramatic victories over the Mets? I just want a head count for all the "I Told You So" notes I'm going to need.

Sure, it was great to see J Roll's huge homer in the 7th and the inexplicable bullpen performance by Geary, Madsen and Alfonseca )who looks six months pregnant) tonight, as well as the big extra inning win last night, but I don't think we can put much stock in these performances. This team will once again prove their inability to string wins together, likely starting tomorrow. Plus, there is no way they sweep the first place Mets in Shea. It just won't happen.

By the way, the more I watch Nunez and Ruiz play, I realize how poor a job Gillick did at GM. It was absolutely criminal to waste valuable dollars on a third baseman and catcher when it was clear the team had huge holes in the bullpen and on the bench. You ask me why I dislike this franchise and organizational errors such as this one pretty much sums things up.