A Summer Tradition Re-Newed

It is Memorial Day Friday and my favorite summer pastime is upon us....The Friday Night Par & Bar at Scotland Run!

As you may recall, for the low price of $52, you receive 9 holes of premium golf, and all the cheap light beer and buffet food you can consume! Not too shabby, huh? I do have one concern though. Usually, me and my friends lay a whuppin' on this place when it comes to the beer and food. I sure hope they continue to let the open bar and continue to closing. I will be disappointed if it has changed.

Anyhow, here is the lineup:

5:30 - My father in law (the Big DK) has a group going out in front of us. Thank God they are ahead of us. They take the game seriously. I had no clue when I made my tee time they'd be directly in front of us, but I'm really happy they aren't behind us. They would not be able to handle the shenanigans from my group.

5:40 & 5:50 We can mix and match the players here to maximize our fun, or to put players of similar skill levels together. This is a very dynamic group. We have the following:

Yours truly - I still suck despite the lessons, but I am debuting my new Rutgers' head covers tomorrow...I just pray I don't lose them by the fourth hole. Here's all you need to know about my golf game....I only get about 4 tee shots a round in the air and my first priority once I get on the course is to find the beer cart girl. Let's hope we get a good one this time, boys!

Johnny Gold - Remember what happened to Tiger's four iron at the Masters? There's always the possibility that one of Johnny's clubs could suffer the same fate. As a result, he's always worth the price of admission.

Southwest Johnny (aka One Ten): One Ten beats the ball with his five iron like it owes him money. Unfortunately for Johnny, he doesn't quite have the same success with the rest of his clubs. I suppose the fact that he is missing part of his spine from a prior surgery could play a factor in his problems. Hey...at least he has an excuse!

Shane - The only things uglier than his swing, is my swing and the shorts he wore last summer. While Shane's skill level fits with ours, we are considering moving him to 5:50 to annoy the balls off the Captain and Donny.

The Captain - El Capitan can play, but can be impatient golfing with hackers like me. Do we put him with seasoned pros like Big DK? Do we put him with me, Johnny Gold and One Ten to annoy him to death? Do we put Shane in his group to antagonize him? This is the pivotal decision of the day.

Donny - Donny is the Captain's tag team partner. If you talk to Donny for about 10 minutes (or better yet receive only one email from him), you'll ask yourself if he is Cholly Manuel's illegitimate son. In all seriousness, Donny may be the best golfer I know....Christ, the guy had a damn golf scholarship coming out of high school until he drank himself out of Campbell University. Basically, Donny is a cross between Cholly Manuel and John Daley. This is his maiden voyage to the Par & Bar. I'm glad he can make it.

Jones - Pat can play. Unfortunately for him, he usually gets stuck playing in my group and I think all the waiting around for me to find my ball distracts him. A big positive in Pat's column is that he is not afraid to argue with......

Mister Nascar - At last year's Par & Bar, MNC regaled us with his Buford T. Justice impersonation. In fact, I think he should play the first five holes in character. This would make the whole experience very gratifying. Anyhow, MNC can play also. He is a natural fit to play with Donny and the Captain, but we'll how things play out.

So there you go. A murderer's row, huh? What a way to kick off the summer. I can't wait.