Monday, December 17, 2007

Stories That Bore Me To Tears


With so many media outlets out there all battling for our attention, it sure seems that they turn to the same stories over and over again. As sports phans, we get completely beat over the head until we cry Uncle. Seriously, how many different ways can the media discuss the Mitchell Report. I don't know about you, but that story lost all its appeal for me about five minutes after it was released. I just wanted to see who was on the list and that it quickly faded into the abyss for me. That's why I turn to blogs and message boards for most info. Sure, they might not be written as well as some of the articles in mainstream outlets, but at least I get a fresh perspective on new stories on the various sites I peruse on a daily basis.

I was looking for something new to discuss tonight, but unfortunately it seems that the media is still fixated on the Pam Oliver report and B West killing at least one owner in every fantasy football league in the country by his decision to kneel the ball on the one yard line instead of scoring an easy TD. As a result, I thought I'd talk about the various sports stories that will never die.

-Steroids in Sports: This is the number one issue that I can't take anymore. I really wish George Mitchell, Jose Canseco, Victor Conte, Barry Bonds, Mark McGwire, Floyd Landis and Greg Anderson would just disappear from our lives as quickly as one of those one hit wonder bands of the 80's. I'm sick of tired of the conjecture over whether player X does or does not use performance enhancing drug.
In my mind, these athletes are adults. If they want to take these drugs that have long term physical effects, then why should I care? And please spare me the argument about taking away records for guys that "cheated". If you don't think that athletes would have taken steroids and HGH throughout history had they been readily available, then you are kidding yourself. Remember the old adage "if you ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'"? That statement wasn't created yesterday. Hank Aaron, Babe Ruth, Cy Young, etc., would have taken the drugs if they were around back in their day.

-Does D Mac stay or go?: Can we please stop trying to read the tea leaves as to whether he will be back next year? Over the past season, it has become clear that he really needs to work on his game during the offseason if he hopes to once again be a winning quarterback in the National Football League. This year was basically a lost cause for D Mac being successful. Not only did they fail to surround D Mac with the necessary play makers, but they failed to tailor the offense around the weapons they did have. During the first 10 games, it was pretty clear that McNabb was not physically 100% and during his last two starts, he looked to be in better condition, but his passing mechanics and decision making ability proved to be deeply flawed.
Compounding the on field issues is D Mac's apparent resignation that he's heading out of town at the end of the year. I don't think I'm alone in thinking that he sounds like a whiney beeeyotch at every press conference when he complains about the fans booing him or the media criticizing him.

Basically, the decision to bring back McNabb comes down to two issues: (1) can he rebound next year with his mechanics and decision making to become a winning quarterback again?; and (2) With all the emotional baggage D Mac is now carrying, is it even worth it? Until both of these questions can be answered, I really don't need to spend a week seeing articles on this issue.

-Gary Bettman is killing the NHL - I never thought it was possible for one man to kill a sport. I was wrong. Gary Bettman has single handedly doomed the NHL to an afterthought of just about every sports phan in America. The only way to cure the ills of the NHL is to do to Bettman what the Corleone family did to the Nevada Senator in Godfather II. In essence, the remaining people that care about this league need to blackmail him by putting a dead hooker in his bed and threatening to turn him over to the authorities if he does not quit his job. I think this is a plausible plan. We just need to find a crime family that cares about hockey.

-The woes of the Phils' ownership - As much as the other issues annoy me, this never ending story sickens me and turns me off to the franchise as a whole. The only thing that could make the Phils' front office less likable is if they put Joe Banner in charge of baseball operations. If I have to hear one more time how they can't chase a free agent due to budget constraints, I swear I might throw up. Guys, do everyone a favor and just sell the damn team.

-Will Mo Cheeks return as the coach of the Sixers? - Seriously, who the hell cares? Until this team has another scorer to team up with Iguodala, the Sixers are a non entity to me. They could dig Red Auerbach up out of his grave, but if he's couching this band of stiffs, I'm not watching or caring.

By the way, if you were wondering whether my bitterness this evening was the direct result of losing my first round fantasy playoff game, then you are absolutely correct.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

B West stuck it right up my ass. I still don't see how an 11 pt. lead w/ 2 mins. to go is a bad thing. He should have trusted himself and not listened to an OT from Michigan. Stick that one in the end zone right up the Cowboys ass and pay me my 1500.

McNabb could pop pills (#5), bang LA stars (whats Romo's number?), crash motorcycles (Big Ben), knock up chicks (BradY), like the rest of the elite QB's in the NFL. No one seems to care. He didn't coordinate dog fights did he?

From his perspective, he takes the team to 4 Championship games and 1 SB. The SB he lost to the greatest team of the last decade, the same team that's on its way to an undefeated season and its 4SB.

He gets booed on draft day (how the hell does he know its only 30 jerkoffs from the worst morning show in the entire country)

He gets criticized for being injury prone. Now, this one is most frustrating to me. A torn Groin, a broken ankle and a ripped up knee. You can't say any of these form a pattern or could be prevented. Its not like its the same injury over and over again. Its not that he fails to rehab and the same injury bites him in the ass. The guy played on a broken ankle and returned from that broken ankle in 4 weeks to win a playoff game. The groin, he played through that injury while the rest of the city sided w/ a Bitch, Fag of a WR.

That brings us to the biggest crime of all. This city sides with a loser that was not there for a playoff victory that has won I believe only 1 playoff game in his career. A player thats buried every QB he's ever played for. A player who has no integrity, just ask the Ravens who traded for him until he changes his tune. A showboat who puts himself in front of the team. A split personality, I mean he has serious issues. Did I mention loser, he failed at comitting suicide. We sided with this guy over one of our own. Only in this city or this world we live in does this make any sense. Who in their right mind would side w/ a player who gave us 12 games versus a guy we drafted, who resurrected the franchise, took us to 4 Championship games. Played injured, is a model citizen.

We liked TO why, because he stood on the star, did sit ups in the driveway with a lawn that was a disgrace. He's a bitch, queer, loser. And we sided w/ this guy versus the franchise.

You need more you sheeps? Fine, now i need to take my anger out on someone. TO is the same WR that for all his talent and terrific QB's and teams he's been associated with; has won absolutely nothing in this league. He played opposite of Jerry Rice and caught passes from Steve YOung and Jeff Garcia and LOST, played along side McNabb and LOST, and now with the 69 Million dollar QB with exactly 23 starts in the league and will lose.

Sure, its easy to say lets move on, turn our back on one of our own like we do in this city. Turn the reins over to a 2nd round pick from some I AA squad who no one saw anything in except our genius staff...Or we could give McNabb another shot. A full year and a half removed from a knee injury. Could we pull a New England and surround this guy with some weapons? Run the ball a little more to balance the offense? Remember when Randall left? He was done, cooked a bust. Goes to Minnesota who had weapons and a staff that played to his strengths. He was MVP in his 2nd year in Minnesota. Tom Brady, he has doubled his TD numbers with the weapons at WR he now has. Peyton Manning is human all the sudden since his go to WR has been hurt all season long.

Give this guy another WR, replace the TE, and get another option at RB for short yardage situations. Bolster the DE position with one more pass rusher, find a nickel corner and draft a safety and this team will win 10 games next year by accident.

Anonymous said...

Very well said Capt. I could add more but there is no need. You are completely dead-on. It is nice to see someone else in this area understand what is really going on.